To write well, you must write what you know.This is what I know......

Sunday, October 7, 2012


“The brain is the body’s most mysterious organ. It learns. It changes. It adapts. It tells us what we see….what we hear. It lets us feel love. I think it holds our soul. But no matter how much research we do, no one can really say how all the delicate grey matter inside our skull works.” –Grey’s Anatomy

There was a time in my life when I fell into an extremely dark place. My whole world changed around me. The energy was negative and I saw the world in shades of grey. I felt haunted by mysterious shadows ready to take my soul further into the dark place. I felt weighed down by doubt and insecurity. I was completely hopeless. There are things that I saw, things that I felt, and things that I heard that no other human being should ever experience.  To some, this may sound completely unbelievable. To me, I feel as if I sound completely insane writing this. But, it is true. It happened.During this time in my life, I had just experienced severe hurt, loss, and trauma. I felt inhuman. Was this whole dark place the mysterious workings of my brain and my heart’s lack of hope and love?
        Love. It is described as one of life’s strongest feelings. It is often said that love closely resembles the same power that hate does. Humankind would benefit from putting more effort into love than hate. Humans are the only species who kill their own kind. We lack compassion. We lack love. My most favorite description of love is found in the Bible, whether you believe in the Bible or not…I feel as if the description of love is what love should be. If this type of love was put into practice, what kind of world would we have? The verse reads like this:
“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.”
I used to live my life in a box. There was left, right, up and down and that was it. There came a time when I broke out of the box and realized there was more than life in a box. I began to see the world for what it was and not what I was told it was. I began to see people for people. I became accepting of all walks of life, because no matter what we are all God’s children. I wanted (and will always want) to show the people of this world true compassion and true love, because let’s all face it—this world is full of evil and hate. I’m considered a deviant in my family—as I have strayed away from all that I used to know and was told. I am told to pray because it is wrong to be accepting of equal rights. I am told to pray because I do not vote for righteousness—and in the words of a great friend, “You are voting for a President, not the Pope.” I’ve learned to smile and walk away. It is not worth it. I will never see eye to eye with my family. I will never see eye to eye with a lot of my friends. I’m just here to say, that I am accepting and respecting of what one chooses to do. I just hope the leaders of our country can keep in mind that God gave us free will—and with that free will we should be allowed to choose how we live life.
The brain is the body’s most mysterious organ. It learns. It changes. It adapts.
I came out of darkness with me still intact. I came out of darkness with an understanding of life and love. I came out of darkness when all hope was lost. From darkness, I found music and songs beneath songs. From out of darkness, I decided to adapt to here and now and not what had passed.  The mere delicacy of the brain almost seems ironic to its mysteriousness. We are born with one brain. Why?  Who will ever know? I’ve learned. I’ve changed. I’ve adapted…maybe I need to thank my brain for opening my eyes and changing me for the better. Maybe I need to thank my brain for adapting to a world that so desperately needs to be shown love, compassion, and equality. Maybe I need to thank my brain for learning, and then in turn, teaching me humanity.

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