(This was originally written on October 11th, 2010)
As I sit down at my laptop to finally write my first blog, there is only one thing one my heart. I think it fits perfect for National Coming Out Day.
In the past several weeks, the world has watched as one too many humans have taken their lives because of bullying. It is sad. It is sickening. It tears up my heart. As a person who can speak from experience, I too have been bullied. I too have attempted suicide. My heart truly hurts for the souls lost.
Sometimes I blame God. Sometimes I blame the church. Sometimes I blame Christians. Sometimes I blame parents.
Genesis 1:27 says, "God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them."
If God, created us in HIS image then why are people born blind? Why are people born deaf? Why are people born without arms or legs? Why are people born with male and female parts? From this can we assume that God is imperfect? Maybe I am completely wrong, but these questions have invaded my mind and I don't know. I don't understand.
I truly feel that God is love. Ineffable love. Agape love. He may be imperfect, but he is love. I also feel that if God knows all the plans He has for our life, plans to give us hope and a future, why do people murder? Are our life choices pre-determined? Are our choices destiny? Has our life already played out and we are just in rewind?
Then I feel, that since God is love no one should go to hell. If God is love, then love is forgiving. Love knows no hate or wrong doing.
I was told once that "Hurting people, hurt people." People hurt and hate because someone in their life hurts and hates them. We have to stop the hurting people. We have to heal the hurt. We have to learn to love.
We are all in this world, living as perfect imperfections.
To all LTGB: Love is loud. It gets better. Don't give up. Don't let anyone create your world for you, for when you do they will make it to small. Don't give up. We are all in the gutter, but some of us look at the stars. If you are at the end of your rope know you are not alone. If you feel you are lost at sea know you have the stars above to guide you home. If you feel alone, know that there is always, always someone you can talk to. You are never alone. Love is louder then loneliness. Love needs to be louder than violence.
I am fighting for every lost, hurt, and lonely person. You were born for such a time as this. You are here for a reason and a purpose. Find that reason and purpose and spread your wings and fly. You get one life, one chance, one shot. Don't waste the opportunity. You are here. You are here. You are here.