One week ago, I had a terrible Saturday. It started out at 7am with a text from a friend—her daughter had stayed the night at a friend’s house and woke up crying wanting to come home. Her two younger children were sleeping. I was going to be babysitting at 9am, so she said she’d leave the house unlocked for me. I offered to go get her daughter so she wouldn’t have to wake her two babies. I made it to the house, got her daughter and headed back to take her home. She said she didn’t feel well, so I decided to take the turnpike to get her home faster. I got on the turnpike and was pulled over for going 75MPH in a 70MPH. The patrolman gave me a warning. I was so relieved. I got to the tollbooth and realized I had no change and I was too afraid to run the tollbooth. I put my car in park, turned on my hazard lights and asked the car beside me for change for the toll. I told them I had a sick kid in the car and needed to get her home. The woman graciously gave me the eighty-five cents. I continued on my way, got my friend’s daughter home, and then stayed because it was time to watch her kids, while she took her oldest garage selling.
She ordered pizza for lunch and after lunch I took off for home. I had a few hours to kill until I had to go get my mom from the airport. I watched a few episodes of Supernatural and then it was time to go get my mom. I got my mom—we drove out to our mechanic to pick up my car. It was originally supposed to cost $500—and it ended up costing $600 as they found out why my car was shaking so bad—motor mounts. I was bummed about being out $600.
I got on the highway and began to make my way home. Here is where I was at this moment—I was going off about 16 hours of sleep in two weeks. I had not showered. I had already been up since 7am. I was hungry. I was oh, so very tired. I was being blinded by the dumb ass truck behind me with blinding LED lights. I thought I was exiting at my exit….NOPE! I got on the turnpike, AGAIN. And AGAIN, I had no change. I started to cry. I got to the tollbooth, put my car in park, turned on my hazards, and went to the car beside me. He gave me fifty cents. I just needed thirty-five more. I waited for about three minutes and then another car came. I asked them for thirty five cents with my eyes filled with tears and my voice shaking. They gave it to me. I thanked them over and over. I threw the money in the booth, the light turned green and I went. I got off at the first exit after the tollbooth—it was the only free one and I didn’t have the change for the ones after that. As I was driving home, my first thought was “I’m going to fix myself a big tall glass of vodka when I get home.”I got home, changed into my pajamas and fixed myself a tall, glass of Coke and vodka. No sooner had I sat down on my bed, I spilled my drink all over myself and my bed. I cursed the entire time while I was ripping off my comforter and my sheets. I cursed under my breath as I walked through the house to throw it all in the washing machine. I cursed the entire time as I was taking off my wet pajamas and changing into new ones. I didn’t even bother to go get another Coke—I just drank the vodka straight out of the bottle I drank and I drank and I drank. It was the perfect drunken end to a terrible day.
It’s amazing how your body and brain function with limited sleep. It’s amazing how your emotions get way out of whack. It’s amazing how your perception is thrown off the grid. It’s amazing how I could call that a terrible day, when in reality it really wasn’t. Sometimes I forget how lucky I am and how good I have it. Sometimes I forget I need to be thankful for what I do have.
This world is full of people suffering from a lot more than getting on the toll road with no money. This world is suffering from a lot more than being out $600 for a car repair. I was ungrateful on my terrible day and realized that it could have been worse. I have it pretty damn lucky.