LOSING MY MIND

“Don’t wonder why people go crazy, wonder why they don’t. In the face of all we can lose in a day…in an instant…wonder what the hell it is that makes us hold it together.”—Grey’s Anatomy

 “I’m losing my mind!!” This is my cliché phrase as I frantically search for misplaced keys, misplaced paperwork, and most certainly my iPhone. The keys that were on your desk five minutes ago have suddenly and metaphorically walked away, yet they are found still hanging in the lock. The phone you are talking on is the phone you are looking for. The paperwork you are looking for is either in your hand; or, sitting right in front of you. It is moments like these, when I really consider that I am losing my mind.

            Last night, I left my keys to my home and office keys sitting on my office desk. I got home to unlock the door and began to dig through my purse. No keys. I knocked, and thankfully someone was home. Thankfully, when I got to work this morning, my keys were still sitting on my desk. Losing keys, losing your phone, losing paperwork is pretty minimal compared to what most people can lose in a day. I do not want to address loss, as I am in a wonderful mood and am taking this blog writing in a completely different direction.
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. It will be a Thanksgiving without my mom, who is up in Canada for a work project. I am sad that she won’t be there; but I am thankful for the friends and family that I will be spending Thanksgiving with.
         I remember countless Thanksgiving’s standing in a circle with loved ones, stating what we are most thankful for. Hoping that the tradition continues this year, I shall start early sharing what I am most thankful this year.
I am thankful for my health. I’ve been through a lot of health scares these past three years, and I finally feel as I am in control of my body.
I am thankful for my job. As much as I complain about my job, I am thankful I have a job that pays my bills and allows me to live. Granted, I live by limited means…I am living and comfortably satisfied with what I have.
I am thankful for my grandparents, who allow me to live with them and do not expect much. However, I do pay them rent and help out with any other expenses. I help cook, clean, and am there to watch the house when they leave for vacation.
I am thankful for my parents, who are always there. A couple months ago, I had to make a repair to my car. I did not have the $600. My parents borrowed it to me and I was able to work out a payment plan to pay them back. They sometimes still spoil me with random shopping trips and take me out for lunch. As crazy as they make me, I love my parents.
I am thankful for my friends. Most of my friendships are purely through internet and phone contact, but I am thankful for those times when I know I could totally count on them to help me out. I am thankful for running into old high school friends—and having the ability to reconnect. My friends have been more a part of my life than my extended family. I trust that my friends know that I would do anything for them. I can always send a funny quote or picture to make them smile; or, be able to identify the quote of a random Facebook status.
I am thankful for “my person.” I am not sure I have ever referred to her as a friend—because, to me…she is more than that. I know that my Grey’s Anatomy obsession is totally showing right now, but she is the Cristina to my Meredith. We are totally insane—and I think that is what allows us to have such a good friendship. We have known each other for about eighteen years. I am, eight years older than her…but she has always said since she was very young, “I have the maturity and common sense of a thirty-year old.” She graduates high school in May. I have held off moving, because I cannot imagine living far away from her. Skype would not be enough.

            It is the simple things that keep me sane. It is the love of friends and family that make life less crazy, however ironically it is also what drives you crazy. Without family…without friends….I’m pretty sure my life would be a completely different story. A character on Boy Meets World put it best when he said, “Lose one friend. Lose all friends. Lose yourself.” So, friends and family thank you for keeping me together. In the face of all I could lose, my job, my friends, my family…the fact that I know love is coming from somewhere and I have that support system in place, makes me know I have what it takes to keep from falling apart.

PS: I am blown away by the number of reads my blog gets. I am thankful for all readers past and present. I hope to one day do this as a profession or write for television shows and movies. Or, maybe write for Ellen Degeneres.